Freedom is usually defined as having the ability to act or change without constraint. But I think in real life, there is a more nuanced meaning for that word.
A few years ago, my friends and I were talking about career paths post graduation. A friend of mine said she is planning to be a stay-at-home-mom for a few years which prompted a lot of unsolicited but well-intentioned advise from the group on why she should not do it. After all, we have spent years (not to mention many thousands of dollars) on education with the unsaid goal of building a successful corporate career. Then, one person said that she cannot believe that someone in this day and age would even consider staying home; and that such decisions are a betrayal of the Feminism movement. That comment made me pause because the outcomes of the Feminism movement is not/should not be asking an entire generation of women to be beholden to a new set of rules and expectations i.e. one that says women should pursue careers; women should choose career over kids. Does that outlook not undermine the very basic tenet of the feminism movement?
I remembered that conversation this past weekend. I am reading (rather listening to) the book – The Water Dancer by Te-Nehisi Coates which traces the story of a young black man, Hi, who discovers that his memories trigger a mysterious power of teleportation that can help slaves escape to the North to be safe. In it there is a conversation between him and a character called Sophie, shown below:
“But freedom, true freedom, is a master too, you see—one more dogged, more constant, than any ragged slave-driver,’ she said. ‘What you must now accept is that all of us are bound to something. Some will bind themselves to property in man and all that comes forthwith. And others shall bind themselves to justice. All must name a master to serve. All must choose”
That line of thought encapsulates freedom to me. Freedom is not about being unshackled from anything and anyone. Freedom is about choice, your choice. Not society’s choice for you (also called norms), your family or friend’s choice for you (termed as expectations), but your choice – loud and clear. At the end of the day, we are all bound to something but we get to choose what and who we are bound to and how.
Do you agree with this more nuanced but simple meaning of freedom?
epiphanu 